Angry Aceh Locals Disable Tsunami Warning System

Too many false alarms since the 2004 Tsunami catastrophe have caused locals to say 'the heck with it.'

Hindu God Sweat Forebodes Major Calamity

A Hindu idol has begun sweating in Northern Nepal, attracting hundreds of pilgrims to witness and repent: this miracle has in the past foreshadowed natural disaster or political turmoil.

Reuters reports:

Sweating was seen on the idol in 2001, media reported, months before a palace massacre when King Birendra and eight other members of the royal family were shot dead in a drug-and-drink fuelled shooting spree by the then crown prince, who later turned the gun on himself.

In other words, we're in for some totally awesome action pretty soon. Even if the pilgrims are successful in repenting, we'll see a lot of dead goats and chickens slaughtered...